End of the Holidays.

This week has been long and difficult in many places.  T-Boy has not been easy, 1000 days since Rich died was definitely not easy, moving bedroom was a long way from easy.  BG's birthday was yesterday, and just about put the tin lid on things.

I sent her an e-card - I don't have an address to send her a proper card or a present or something like that.  Part of me doesn't expect it will be opened.  Part of me doesn't expect she will even know it was there.  A bigger part of me hopes it will be, and hopes her mother is generous enough to her father's memory to acknowledge that we exist.  Part of me is just sad that in losing Rich we lost BG as well.

Maybe one day we'll see her or hear from her again.  I'll give her the box of stuff we have for her, and talk to her about it all, go through it all.

I just hope she knows we are always going to be here for her, whenever she needs us or wants to know what happened to her father.

In other news, I'm working on a Sunday morning again.  Yay.  Then we'll be taking T-Boy back to his mothers, and collecting the AC, and that will be the holidays over.  We achieved a lot though this holidays, hard though they were.

That which doesn't kill us makes us stronger!

Another early morning

I've been awake since 4 this morning.  It has to do with bad dreams (not mine) the way they were dealt with, and a general frustration of just not being able to do a damn thing right.

However.

On the other hand.

I am up early, watching some daft programme about swordfishing, and waiting for BBC Breakfast to start.  I'll catch the news and weather, and then move on with the rest of my day.

The rest of my day will involve preparing for tomorrow, (printing some stuff off basically) and continuing with the AC's room.  Yesterday I managed to take the bed apart, move the bed to the other room and reassemble the bed.  T-Boy was amazed when I said I was going to do this.  "But Daddy isn't home!"  Yes, well, some of us don't need a man to do our work for us thanks T-Boy.  Yesterday he learnt how to use an allan key, some of the many uses of WD-40, and how a lubricant works on screws that have been wedged in for a long time.

It was not without incident.  I gave him breakfast, (dry cornflakes, at his request) and he kept dropping them on the floor and sofa.  I moved him to the table, he refused to eat them.  I turned the timer over, and he got on with it.  The timer ran out, he refused to eat, and sulked some more.  I turned the timer over, he got on with it.

Then he calmed down.  He was lovely.  He helped upstairs, chatting away like anyone else would. He fetched and carried when he was asked to, for about 30 mins, then went off on a massive tantrum about me asking where he had put something.  Then he was sorry, and helped, then went off on a massive tantrum because I'd asked him not to roll his eyes when I was speaking to him.  Then I said we were going to take Daddy his lunch, and he cried for 30 minutes because I was going to tell Daddy what he had been up to.  We started to walk down to Daddy, and he was lovely.  Chatty, interested, telling my about some film he'd seen, we got down to Daddy, we got back, (still lovely!) I made him lunch, he refused to eat it until I threatened to make spaghetti bolognaise with tomatoes in it for his tea, and then he ate 2 massive wraps with no more fuss.

Sue came round to help because she was bored, and he was lovely all afternoon, really on best behaviour, which was so much nicer than the morning.  We worked like navvies all afternoon and got most of it done, the bed back together, and it just leaves me a bit of sorting out today to do.

I also want to get these dogs sewn up today.  I'll take T-Boy into town to do a few things and get some kapok to stuff the dogs with and so on.

I also want to make pasta and bread and cake today (carb rich diet lol!)

There's about a million things I need to do, but I'm going to have to take it slowly - I'm knackered!

Lovely night

Last night we, as usual, had friends round to play. R and I both enjoy Dungeons and Dragons, and in fact, that's where we got to know each other 4 years ago. At the moment we're playing Earthdawn. It's good in many ways, but lots of it's goodness is that they have only known us as us. None of them have known He-Ex and me, nor She-Ex and R, as couples, just R and I as the smiley people we are. That's good, because it means there are no comparisons, no need to drag up the past, no need for any of it, just an acceptance of us, of the fact that we do have a past, of the fact that it doesn't matter how crucial a game it is, if BG calls the world can wait, and that the AC loves R with reasons, as opposed to genetics, as one of them put it one day.

So anyway, we're sat playing last night, and I'm sewing. 3 years ago (amazing that it's that long!) I made R a dicebag to go to the Championships with. It's very basic, felt square, black one side, white the other, drawstring top. Very him. But he thought he would like a new one for this years Champs, so I dug through the material stash, and found some material he liked and started cutting and sewing. It was basically a long rectangle of material that looped around the bottom and folded over the top, and two curved end pieces which fitted in. I finished it last night, and it made a great bag. In a girly, clutch bag kind of way. Hmmm.

And then it ended up on H's head. After it had been a hat for various people, H asked if he could have it for a hat, so I said absolutely and he took it home with him. There's no way R could have taken it to the Champs. He would have, because he loves me and I made it for him, but no, lol!










So it's back to the drawing board for me with that one! Thankfully, it's no effort to sew something like that, although I'm not a good seamstress. It was very satisfying though, which is why I made a small thing with one of the inserts that I was going to put into the bag to separate the different kinds of dice. I quite like it, but I think it will be appropriated by the child for putting small things in. And that's very good.





































In other news, there is nothing exciting! We've had 2 pictures of the BG, one of her face and one of the back of her head looking at flamingoes.

And now the AC is up so I'm getting off of here to go and play. He's a bit coldy this morning, but he should be fine for church. Next week I start doing the notices for church, which is going to be more work, but also giving something back to an institution which has given me so much.

Laters lovely people!