I have fabric.
I have a machine.
I have tv.
I have cakes to bake.
I have tables to clear.
I have a bed to make.
I have a kitchen to clean.
I don't have email from the She-Ex.
I don't have email from I-t-B.
I don't have to take any action I don't want to, in that case.
I don't have to plan.
I don't have to mark books.
I don't have to worry about food.
I don't have to worry about anything.
I had all the stuff in the top list before I didn't have Rich.
The bottom stuff came and went, as it usually does.
I don't have Rich here.
A long time ago, and it feels like forever, but it wasn't, the She-Ex wrote
From:
To:
Sent: Monday, 29 June, 2009 17:07:34
Subject: Re: Blog updated
Really Sarah, what are you guys living with, apart from Richard not having BG, his life seems pretty damned spiffy right now.
I guess she still thinks my life is pretty dammed spiffy right now. Or else she wouldn't be randomly emailing me like it's all fine. Like she can be abusive, and then email to ask for something, then just ignore everything I say to her like I said nothing.
And that's ok, in many ways. It's quieter without the constant up and down of her moods. It's nicer without the vitriolic outbursts. But it's rubbish without Rich, without BG even for the paltry amount of contact her mother allowed. I won't get any now, I shouldn't think.
*shakes self*
Time to sew. We're getting maudlin here.
Cup of tea, and writing laters.
