Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Broken - in full view.

My son broke yesterday.

In front of the whole school, in front of the whole assembly, with 300 pairs of eyes watching, he broke big style.

It was my fault, it was life, it was the time of year, it was lots of things.  But the result was that he had to be brought to me at the front of the hall, and I had to take him out, racked with noisy sobs, as the entire hall sat in stunned silence.  Yep.  He was *that* noisy.

We were learning a new hymn.  I do hymn practice, because the music co-ordinator says she can't sing.  It's a confidence thing, she can sing, but I digress.

It's a Remembrance Sunday hymn.  It talks about remembering the soldiers that time has forgotten, but how we must remember.  I don't just teach a hymn, I talk about it, about why they need to learn it, what it means, and so on.

Me - "Why do we need to learn this one?"
Child - "Because it's nearly Poppy Day." (Someone from my class last year!)
Me - "What date do we remember?
Child - "11th November." (Also someone from my class last year!)
Me - "And what do we call that date?"
Child - "Remembrance Day."
Me - "Not quite, Remembrance Sunday is the closest Sunday to this day."
AC - "I've got another date."
Me  - "Ok, what's that?"
AC - "2009"
Me - "Yes.  I know. Umm.  Ok, who has heard of the word 'Armistice?"
(Anyone who has ever been in my class and ahs a brain puts a hand up.)
Me - "Ok, what's that?"

Then a heart rending sob, and a voice from the back somewhere. "Miss, Miss,  {AC} needs you.

So I took him out, I took him to his teacher, I didn't keep him with me, although I wanted to.  He has to learn to deal with the creeping up and the leaping out on you that grief does.

But again, I want to find that aunt of Rich's, and his brother, who said that how he and AC felt about each other didn't matter, and say "LOOK! LOOK!  Look at his tear stained face over 3 years on, and honestly tell me that it didn't matter."  It's not about the money, the rights, the name, it's about the love.

I was going to write a much more positive post today, about the Scotty ball at the weekend, but right now, I'm not.

Laters people.


2 comments:

Chef Penny said...

Oh poor AC! My heart broke for him and you! (((hugs))) and great job, Mummy , for doing what is best not easy. :)

Domestic Goddesque said...

I cannot imagine how tricky that must be. THanks for commenting on my post: amended accordingly!