Thursday, March 19, 2009

The protocol of blogging about sex.

I leave out a massive part of my life when I blog on here. And I blog about pretty much everything else, from what we're eating and wearing to the state of the universe. I can't blog about work too much because of child confidentiality, but that's not what I mean.

I mean sex.

Sex, making love, shagging, horizontal jogging, socialness, whatever you want to call it. And in fact, I've read a *lot* of blogs now, and very few people have sex. Ever. If they do, well no one is talking about it!

Sex is a huge part of our relationship. After just over 3 years together, it's still several times a week, heading to every night, and can be as often as a few hours between. In that 3 years, the longest we've gone without it, (when he's been doing his normal job and not in the Abroad) is 3 days. We like it. We love it. We both thought this side of things would tail off a bit - one cannot carry on like a honeymooner for ever - but it hasn't. If anything, now it's better than it has ever been.

Obviously, it was not always so. I was not his first, neither was he my first. However, it is clear that we are each others best! We have taught each other new ways of doing things, we have found new depths in ourselves, he has discovered a willingness to give and love in my that he has never recieved before, and I have discovered stamina I never had to use before, as well as the ability to orgasm more than one and in different ways. To paraphrase Mr McMillan, "I've never had it so good!"

But why?

He is just a bloke, with the same bits and pieces, I am just a girl, with the same parts as any other girl, slightly sagging with the effects of gravity and pregnancy and 2.5 years of breastfeeding, but still slim enough to see my own feet. Insert part A into apurture B, job done. And yet it is more than that.

I think the basis of our good sex life lies in the trust we have, the love we have, the lust we have, the connection we have with and for each other. It's shown in the little things, the hand holding, the stroking of backs as we pass, the hugging, the snuggling on the sofa, and it comes out in the big things, like sex and future planning and so on.

When I want to blog about sex, it's not because I want to record all the porngraphic details (those are mine alone to savour when he is away, or the day is long and difficult!) it's because I want to write about how much I feel for him, how much I feel he feels for me, and how it is expressed. It's an aspect of our loving each other, of my life, that is hidden. We have a very transparent relationship. It is what it is, pure and simple. Just two people, loving and accepting each other, sharing hearts, minds, loves, lives, just like any other good longterm relationship.

And yet we still go to bed early, just so we can go to sleep at the time we need to in order to get up.

I like that.

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