Sunday, August 16, 2009

Mini-Me blogging

I've borrowed, with a view to purchase, a friends eee-pc. It's tiny. I've nick named it the mini me. It'll be easier to carry around than the laptop though, if I do decide to get it, although it is absolutely TINY!

It's been a good day, all in all. There have been some tears, but not so many, there has been laughter and smiles and playing and friends round and cleaning and doing and talking.

Tonight, we were talking about beaches. I was talking about the time that the She-Ex was angry because the BG remembered going to the beach with the She-Ex and her Daddy and it wasn't the She-Ex, it was me. We had a lovely day that day. The BG was wearing a pretty white dress I'd bought her when I saw it in town one day, and the AC was loving being out and about. Rich drove and we were supposed to be going to a castle that day, but we didn't, it was too expensive, so we went to the beach, and there were very few people there. We had a carton of juice and crisps, and the children ran around and collected stones ad dared each other into the sea. Rich and I sat, leant up against each other, chatting, and it was a picture perfect moment of how family life should be.

Later, he told me it was one of the reasons he knew that he and She-Ex couldn't be together, for the BG's sake, because she should be free and happy and running about like that, and he wanted that for her so badly. He said it was a glimpse of normal family life, which he realised, that day, was what he wanted. not necessarily with me, that came later, that realisation, but if it could be with the She-Ex, then good, and we talked about how he could try and help that to happen, but eventually it was clear it wouldn't. But t was a glorious day, and I don't mind who that little girl thinks was there, I'm just glad she had a memory of her Daddy, because now, that's all she'll ever have.

And that's so damn sad.

But as the AC said "He can see her whenever he wants now." and he can. And that's a *good* thing.


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